Schweffy’s apparently going through some “lesbian drama” with “two other girls.” My guess is it’s Kate and Kelly (sp). Whatever it is, it’s really upsetting her. It started yesterday apparently, and it’s gotten worse today. But she won’t tell me what exactly it is, and I’m not going to make her tell me or anything. It’s her choice not to tell me. But she said “You don’t want to know” which makes me freak out. She’s cheated on me before, what’s to say she’s not going to do it again? I have to take her at her word (she lied to me about Kate before as well) that she’s not doing anything with Kate because she’s with me (this small complication didn’t stop her before).
But I have to be trusting until/unless I have reason not to. But I’ve forgiven her for lying and cheating on me once. A second time and I don’t think I’ll ever forgive her. Last night, to my horror, she suggested that we just be friends. Yesterday everything important to me went crappy (my relationship with my parents, my car, college) but at the end of the day at least I still had Schweffy and our “trial relationship.” Then at night she decided to make my wonderful day even better. I was speechless, all I could say was, “We tried.” And then she wanted to let me go.
Suffice it to say I had a simply delightful night.
So today I ran to school. I need a car. Talked to Hayley some. Trying to become interested in her more and some of the stuff she’s into. Apparently she rolled her ankle in a lacrosse game yesterday. That sucks. I remember rolling my ankle all the time in Team Sports General last year, but surprisingly I’ve never done it playing tennis.
Ah, tennis. I miss that sport. I should have played for the school team this year. There’s no reason I couldn’t have. Maybe I’ll do a rec league like last year during the summer, or take more lessons with Coach Ed. I need to see how much money I have this summer to mess around with…
Speaking of money, I got a raise today. Don’t have a clue how much though. I’m hoping I make $7/hr. Then I’ll be able to get a car. Unfortunately I won’t know until the day after prom when I’ll get my check. Which sucks, I had really wanted to drive Stephanie that day. I want so badly to make her feel special that day … well there’ll be other ways to do that.
Well tonight me and Schweffy’s talk was better than lately. 22:38. Nothing like the old days, in January, when we went for hours and hours. But it’s still longer than lately. We kept the convo nice and light, and I like it that way. We ended on the agreement that next time we see each other, I’m going to stab her with my nose.