The past week has honestly just sucked for me. Last Monday my Mother called me crying that everything was just terrible. My Grandfather was not doing so good, he has fallen, and everyone was worrying about him. I told her he had to go to the hospital, and then be put in a nursing home, because the stress of taking care of him was really being to affect my Grandmother’s health. The only problem was that I’ve been telling my mother that for a month. She always agrees with me, but backs out when it actually comes time to do it.
My sister called me later that day. I began to tell her what was going on. She broke down crying to me. (I haven’t seen or heard my sister cry in 7 years.) I just wanted to tell her that she had to make sure my Grandfather got taken to the hospital.
The next day I texted my Mom and said, “Happy Birthday.” I got the response of, “Chet’s on the way to the ER.” At this point I’m now panicked, even though I’m the one that told them to take him there. I can’t even talk to my Mom about what’s going on because I’m in a class. So I get out of class and call her. All she can say is that they’re at the hospital and they’re waiting. She then asks me to call my cousin, and let her know what’s going on. I then got continuous calls from her looking for updates.
The first hint I got that this wasn’t good was talking to my brother. I’ve never known him to show emotion. When I called I could tell he was upset. That scared me more than you know.
Wednesday wasn’t any better. Actually it was worse. My Mom called around noon to tell me that my Grandfather had a stroke. Then they did a CT and found he had a brain bleed. I was sad at this point, but had just started to accept it when my mom called back to tell me that there was nothing they could do. So now it was just a matter of time.
On Thursday he was moved into Hospice Care. I was upset. I didn’t go to classes, I barely moved. I wasn’t sure what to do. I was just sad and scared. I laid around and cried. That night my mom told me I was coming home on either Friday or Saturday, because it wouldn’t be long.
Friday was my Birthday! At 6:30 AM I got a call from my mom. My Grandfather had passed away. Well I don’t really need to tell anyone, it wasn’t a good birthday. My roommate was wonderful though. She woke up and came over to my bed and held me, got me tissues, and just sat with me while I cried. I’ve got to also give credit to my amazing boyfriend, Aaron. He took me to the mall and got my mind off of everything for awhile. I packed up and went home that night. Not much of a birthday for me.
Well when I got to my Grandmother’s house that night, my mom, 2 aunts, uncle and gram were there. There was one other person there. That was my “Uncle Charlie.” Also known as Toot ( pronounced like foot with a T). He is my Uncle John’s best friend, and has been like another uncle for my entire life.
On Saturday there was a lot of running around that had to be done. Shopping, going to the funeral home, back to my gram’s, taking her to get her hair done, more shopping, dinner at my gram’s. I spent most of this weekend at my gram’s. There was one point that night where sitting in the living room were me and 3 other people. People who other than my Grandmother I feel had the strongest connection to my Grandfather. We all sat there and cried. No one tried to comfort anyone else. It was hard, and shocking for me. I was watching people I have never seen cry ever, blubber like babies.
Sunday was also very busy, and very tear filled. It was the day of the viewing. I was so touched by how many people came. There was so much love in that funeral home. It was amazing.
Monday was the funeral. It was by far the hardest day of my life thus far. I stood and watched my Grandmother cover up his body. I held my Mom while she cried. I sat in crying silence in the car with my siblings. I cried though the entire mass, especially my Uncle’s beautiful eulogy, and the closing song of Danny Boy. I cried as I stood in my cousin’s arms, watching the casket being lowered into the ground. I cried while my sister gave the most simple, and lovely toast at lunch. Last of all I cried back at my gram’s when we watched my Grandparents’ 50th Wedding anniversary video.
I’ve got to say thank you to everyone who was at the wake and funeral, who extended condolences in whatever way, who cooked or bought food. Thank you to everyone that was there for me and my family during this very hard time.
I’ve got to give a special thanks to Toot. He basically moved into my Gram’s on Friday Afternoon and didn’t leave until today. He took care of everything. Every time someone moved he jumped in and said, “What do you need? I’ll get it.” I honestly cannot express how grateful I am for everything Toot did for our family. I don’t know if some of us would have gotten through it without him.
