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What the Jabulani?

Author: Aaron J
03.07.2010

What the Jabulani just happened?? I knew Germany was going to beat Argentina, but 4-0? This is insanity!

“What the Jabulani?” or WTJ can be used interchangeably with WTF. However, it denotes even MOAR surprise and implies that the speaker is shocked, appalled, and flabbergasted at the exact same time.

Also, I hate it how every time somebody loses, they are taking the opportunity to blame it on the BALL. Srsly? You are the best soccer players in the world. Some people are able to score goals. Even if the ball is different, if you’re the one who can’t score with it, you suck more than they do, and therefore deserve to lose.

World Cup IV

Author: Aaron J
02.07.2010

After the exciting Round of 16, here is a super awesome chart showing how the rest of the games are going to go:

100% correct, of course.

As for the final four:

1. Spain will beat Uruguay to take third place, once again failing to win the cup.
2. The Netherlands will beat Germany to win first place. The Dutch will play total football and take full advantage of their opportunities, which is something most teams seem to fail to do. The Germans are younger and less experienced, and have less team chemistry than the Dutch squad.

And if you think I’m jumping on some sort of bandwagon after the surprise win over Brazil, I picked Holland to take first place since the first day of the tournament.

World Cup III

Author: Aaron J
21.06.2010

Adjusted predictions after the second round of games:

GROUP A

1. Uruguay

2. Mexico

GROUP B

1. Argentina

2. Nigeria

GROUP C

1. Slovenia

2. England

GROUP D

1. Germany

2. Serbia

GROUP E

1. Netherlands

2. Denmark

GROUP F

1. Paraguay

2. Italy

GROUP G

1. Brazil

2. Portugal

GROUP H

1. Spain

2. Chile

Predictions on the rest of the round:
1. Uruguay will upset Mexico.
2. South Africa will beat an unpracticed French squad in turmoil 1-0.
3. South Korea will play well, as they have been, but Nigeria will rally and beat them with a strong right side attack and one of the best goalkeepers in the world.
4. In a massacre and a half, Argentina will kill Greece, who still has yet to win a match against a full squad.
5. Slovenia is not to be underestimated, but England will win by a goal.
6. The US and Algeria will draw.
7. Germany should have little trouble with Ghana.
8. Likewise, Serbia should have little trouble with Australia.
9. This game could really go either way, but I’ll go with Denmark due to their superior chemistry and flag.
10. Holland will win this 2-0. Cameroon won’t play poorly, but the Dutch team is simply better.
11. Italy will have learned from their mistakes in the last match and come back in their game against Slovakia.
12. New Zealand will play well and possibly even score first, but Paraguay will win this match to take the group 2-1.
13. In a game that will likely be EPIC, Brazil will win 1-0.
14. Demoralized, the lowest-ranked team in the finals will lose to the Ivory Coast, which is actually a very good team. It is unfortunate they are in the Group of Death.
15. Spain has not been living up to expectations this year, and Chile has a good squad and a great coach. This will be a draw.
16. Honduras will beat Switzerland by a goal.

World Cup II

Author: Aaron J
16.06.2010
GROUP A

1. Mexico

2. Uruguay

GROUP B

1. Argentina

2. Nigeria

GROUP C

1. England

2. Slovenia

GROUP D

1. Germany

2. Serbia

GROUP E

1. Netherlands

2. Denmark

GROUP F

1. Italy

2. Paraguay

GROUP G

1. Brazil

2. Portugal

GROUP H

1. Spain

2. Chile

Some things we have learned from the first matches:
1. Robert Green is the greatest goalkeeper England has ever seen. The fact that he looks like a leprechaun when dressed in green only increases his skill level. His greatest strength lies not in his extensive experience at the European Cup-and-higher levels, but in his uncanny ability to defend against the weakly-kicked shot.

Photo: Getty Images. FIFA.com

2. Serbia will self-destruct. At least, if they keep playing like they did against Ghana. Cards aplenty were thrown at Serbians, including one that was a deeper shade of yellow than the rest. Then, with a team of 10 men, some failure decided that he was actually a linebacker trying to deflect a pass. The obvious handball IN THE PENALTY BOX led to the game-winning goal for Ghana.

3. Uruguay is for real. Unlike Serbia, they’re not seeing the cards (so far) that they have been accustomed to. They seem ready to make a legitimate run at the cup, which they haven’t won in 60 years.

4. Greece is still horrible. It’s too bad they don’t play Australia, because the “Socceroos” are SO horrible they’d likely lose to Greece. All that false hope held by the Aussie fans, like “O we’ve got so much experience!!1″ translates to “Our team is old and we suck :(”

5. Cameroon had a shot, and now they do not. Cameroon’s offense failed against Japan in their first match. They still have a shot at the Round of 16, but they just have to beat Denmark and the Netherlands. Sounds simple enough. (sarcasm)


6. Denmark is terrific at scoring goals. As you can see in the video above, “On Team Denmark, there are no superstars or big names, just a perfect mix of experience, talent, and spirit…” or in other words, the Danes’ biggest (only?) asset this year is teamwork. This paid off greatly in their first match against the Netherlands, where two Danish players collaborated to score a goal on themselves.

In order to execute this move properly, make sure you are only inches from your own goal. Then, head the ball LOW, preferably into the back of your nearest teammate.

14.06.2010

Not likely. And really, that answer has little to do with the 1-1 draw with Paraguay today.

One criticism of Italy is that they are too old; this is nonsense. Italy played with youthful vigor against Paraguay. The only reason it was a draw was Paraguay’s defense.

The reason Italy will not likely return to the final round this year is more because there are other teams that, unless they are eliminated in an upset, will destroy the Italian team we saw playing today. I do think they’ll win their ridiculously easy group, and then beat 2E, who will be either Denmark (the own-goal team), Japan (the team that can’t score), or Cameroon (the team that lost to Japan). Any of those three beating Italy would certainly be an upset.

Unfortunately, in the next round, Italy would likely play Spain, and that is where their run will end.

Does Italy have a bad squad? Definitely not. But they are not elite enough to repeat, I reckon.

13.06.2010

Firstly, are the grammar correct in that question? LOL I feel like it should be “is Germany” but then again, I am not literate.

Germany beating Australia was no surprise. Germany beating Australia in the emphatic manner in which they did was.
FIFA.com wants to know if that 4-0 win has, in your view, established Joachim Low’s side as the favourites to win the 2010 FIFA World Cup South Africa™.

FIFA.com

Ya know what? It really has. Going into this, people were wondering if any team could beat Spain and England. While Spain has yet to play a match, England has come off to a shaky start.

Everyone had questions and doubts about Germany, given its young squad and several injuries. But all that was laid to rest today by the intensity of their game and margin of victory. Then again, they did play Australia.

Their next opponent is Serbia, on June 18th. If Serbia manages to NOT self-destruct as they did this morning against Ghana, this could be a competitive match. If Germany can pull this out, especially with a wide margin of victory, they will be solidified as THE team to beat.

World Cup Son

Author: Aaron J
12.06.2010

Yea, so the FIFA World Cup has returned after a long 4 years, to grace us all with some kickass soccer for one whole month. Naturally I want Antarctica to win. Unfortunately, we did not qualify this year, so here’s who is definitely going to the Round of 16:

GROUP A

1. Mexico

2. Uruguay

GROUP B

1. Argentina

2. Nigeria

GROUP C

1. England

2. Algeria

GROUP D

1. Germany

2. Serbia

GROUP E

1. Netherlands

2. Cameroon

GROUP F

1. Italy

2. Paraguay

GROUP G

1. Brazil

2. Portugal

GROUP H

1. Spain

2. Chile

I would put down how the rest of the games would go, spoiler alert NETHERLANDS WIN THE CUP, but I am far too tired. Later, perhaps.

Italy has Triumphed!

Author: Aaron J
27.06.2006

ITALY HAS TRIUMPHED! in overtime 2-0……. i have won…..

I hated on Team USA and picked Ghana to beat them. Well I guess our men’s team isn’t as cool as our women’s, and we got eliminated by an African country. But since I bet on them I don’t care and won $114! My Brazil also came first in their group! w000000000000000000…

And today Tuesday 6/27 is the game that France will reach the quarterfinals.

26th place

16th place NDj ($201.00 won)

My money was on BRAZIL for a while. Too long. They were eliminated by FRANCE!

FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE FRANCE!

wtf

lol @ this Brazil bashing:

Brazil ready to mount strong defence

Perhaps the most cowardly bet of all would be to bet in favour of Brazil in a World Cup match. They currently hold the cup, and they have won it five different times (and have been the runner-up another two times), rightfully deserving their number one spot in the world.

Home to everything and everyone in the world ending in -do, Brazil are also popular with the ladies.

rofl! ;)

I think France winning is a pretty safe bet: Les Bleus intend to lay the ghosts of 2002 to rest

The Blues have had quite a good career in the last decades. They played the semifinals of EuroCup in 1996, hosted and won the 1998 World Cup and then won the EuroCup in 2000. However, it must be kept in mind that after winning the World Cup in ’98, they didn’t win a single match nor score a single goal in the 2002 World Cup. One should also keep in mind that their logo involves a cock.

They should like to play the Argentinians – but wouldn’t we all?

Big Ben and the World Cup

Author: Aaron J
14.06.2006

OMG AARON! BIG BEN IS INJURED! LOOKS LIKE THE STEELERS ARE GOING TO SUCK THIS YEAR!

Jesus plesus, shut up! Yeah, Ben was riding on his hog w/o a helmet and smashed in his face and a leg or something. But his face isn’t going to affect his game; he’s rich enough after only 2 seasons (really great seasons, btw) to replace every tooth in his grill if he needed to.

And as for the other random limb, he’s been busted up before, and mid-season. Now it has more time to heal, and even the preseason doesn’t start until August.

Oh yes. World Cup.

So I tell a few people who my money is all on this year (Brazil) and they call me a cowardly cheapskate. Wtf. Yeah, so it’s a pretty sure shot. But when you’re betting money (at least when I’m betting money), you go for who you think will win.

This year all those “uppies” are rooting for Togo, which is at 0-1 so far and happens to be at the bottom of its group. So I said, yeah, I’ll bet on Togo. I bet that Togo would finish at the bottom of their group. Where is the love? Brazil, and stop asking.